So, you finally found the one good man you were looking for all this time. Good for you, but now you will have to KEEP him which can sometimes be challenging at times for most women, and that is where the troubles will start to happen.
How to keep a good man
To secure your man, you should know that men and women are different, not just physically, but mentally as well.
When it comes to relationships, just loving each other is not the answer to everything. It takes things like honesty, commitment, responsibility, etc. It does take just as much work to keep him as you did to get him. It takes it all and many other small things to make the relationship withstand the “bored-ness” of time. But even the most harmonious one can crumble in a matter of months if someone makes a huge mistake.
To make him stay by your side, there are some things you should and should not do, or else he will leave you in a flash.
What NOT to do
- Distrust your beloved one
Distrusting your partner is a very dangerous behavior, and you should avoid it at all costs. If you have any concerns about his infidelity, openly talk to him about them and make things clear. If he ever finds out that you are checking on his phone without his permission or that you inspect all his pockets when he gets home, your relationship will fall apart very fast.
- Don’t always check-in on him
This behavior complements the above one and is another step you should not take. Not only men, but women as well hate when their partners are overly controlling. You must understand that if someone wants to cheat then they will cheat regardless, no matter if you check in and/or how many times you check in. The only thing you can pretty much do is make sure your being the best partner YOU can be and adding as much value to the relationship as possible.
- Don’t make him to choose between you or his friends
To maintain a good relationship, both parts must be mentally healthy.
To achieve that, they must have activities that do not involve their partners or else the relationship will wear off. Sometimes periodically separating from each other for some “air” is a good thing. If your partner likes to play video games, soccer or go fishing or another activity with his friends, do not make him choose between you and them. Just know that this can be a good “balance” in the relationship.
- Don’t blackmail
Do not try to blackmail him with your emotions. It is not healthy, and when he perceives that you are not sincere and are in fact trying to control him, he will leave you to your drama.
- Don’t disrespect his opinions
You should know that disrespecting someone’s opinion is not a polite thing to do and should be avoided, even if you don’t agree with the idea. Doing so with your partner is an even greater issue, and you should pay attention to not do this.
- Don’t asking things you really don’t want to know
Asking a man what he thinks of your new haircut is just pointless from his point of view. If he likes the changes that you have done to your looking, he will communicate it to you, without you having to ask for it. On the other hand, if you do not really want to know his opinion, just don’t ask because your setting yourself and your emotions up for failure.
- Don’t invade his personal space
Every man has a special space inside his head where he keeps his most sacred treasure: The box of nothing. This box of nothing is the favorite place of men worldwide.
What is inside of it, you might ask. Well, there is nothing inside for YOU to know. That is what makes it wonderful. Whenever they feel stressed, they go to the box of nothing and relax. Let him be to himself in solitude sometimes. It’s like turning off your brain. You think of nothing. You feel nothing. It could be the end of the world outside, but if a man is in his box of nothing, he is happy.
Men need this space to relax and reorganize their thoughts, so make sure you keep your distance whenever he needs a moment alone.
It is easy to know when a man goes to his box of nothing. He will sit in front of the TV and will start zapping the channels. What is he watching? Nothing. What is he thinking? Nothing. What does he want? Nothing. He really just wants to be left alone from the “nagging” so to speak.
- Not showing affection
Men are physical beings and need affection to feel loved. They like to be hugged, be caressed. I’m not even talking about sex, but daily gestures that will signalize him that you still love him.
Also, sex should NOT be used as a tool to control him, but a tool to CONNECT with him. Why? Because most men know that they can get sex just as much as women can from anywhere. It’s really no different to either party.
- Not clearly stating what you want
One of the things that men hate about women is that they do not convey the full message in a clear way and most women just “expect” a man to read their minds. While men want X and state that they want X, women seem to disbelief the power of honesty and usually use hints or other subconscious meanings while having a conversation. If you want to say something, say something, no hidden meanings. Just be upfront and honest. Say what you mean and mean what you say to the man.
- Don’t be his mother
Psychologically speaking, men are most linked to their mothers, while women are most linked to their fathers, but that doesn’t mean that you need to act like his mother. He doesn’t need you to tell him what to do or what to wear and/or how to dress.
Single women looking for a good man
Besides the above mentioned, you need to understand that other women will still be looking for their good men as well and nothing should be taken for granted. If you do not take care of yourself as well, no man will be at your side, doesn’t matter how “diva” you are.
Keep a good body and mental health, be polite, stay humble and always have a smile on your face and your good man shall be yours until death does you apart.